Someone wrote a very kind message in my guestbook and it lit a fire under my ass, hi, I'm sorry:)
I've been meaning to add an update, just a little note or at least something but I've been so all over the place that every time I sit down I usually have to do something else.
This past semester has been a lot of writing--which I'd been expecting, I'm going to school for fucking journalism, what a surprise--so I think that ended up taking it out of me. At least, as it pertains to my writing for this site on top of all the creative writing and Game Mastering I've been doing.
With all that's been going on in my country recently, I also find it difficult to sit down and write about anything but. It's like watching a car crash in slow motion, and Chekov's gun is involved somewhere, I just can't remember when I saw it last. Maybe 2015, maybe earlier, but for my entire life I've watched the current state of things building. As you may be able to tell, I've elected to just write all my thoughts out. --To the person who was kind enough to ask how I was doing in my guestbook hi!!! I really appreciate you!! Don't think all this is your fault, I just happen to be like this lol ;p.
Being from New York is a blessing I took for granted. You meet everyone from everywhere, at least once. That kind of shit dispels a lot of conservative rhetoric just off the bat. Having the fucker elected the first time felt like a slap in the face, especially knowing the county I live in is overwhelmingly red for our proximity to the city. Now it's happened a second time, and I knew exactly what to expect and how bad it would get. As a result, I think I'm still waiting for the sting of it, and that hasn't hit yet, at least not fully.
It's not even that it's 'not bad enough yet', or some other reductive bullshit. It doesn't matter how bad it gets--any loss is too much, it always batters our country's most vulnerable first. But I'm still watching the car crash. It's still happening, and its difficult not to feel numb or at a loss. My rights are being ripped out from under me. My friends and their families--who have worked tirelessly to carve out a space for themselves, to get into medical schools and law schools and community colleges, to be first people in their families to graduate high school--are being taken from their homes in broad daylight.
And it will end some day, fascist regimes that flourish in influential countries burn out hot and fast, but it's more so just a matter of who will get burned and how completely. How far will it put the world back?